How can Christian views on marriage be superior to worldly views if the divorce statistics are the same? And let's be honest, just because you don't get divorced, doesn't mean your marriage is a good one.
Does a biblical understanding of the roles and purpose of marriage
really make a difference in the amount of happiness a couple will
experience? If the results are the same, you would have to conclude that
it doesn't, right?
But could it also be that a Christians
have adopted the world's paradigm without even realizing it? Or, more
likely, there is a gap between what most Christian's say they believe and what they really believe. In academic language, their confessional theology is different than their functional theology.
as a house cannot be built without a solid foundation, a marriage
cannot thrive or be stable without having a true Christian view of
marriage as a foundation. That foundation is not just "we both love
God". The marriage must be built with God's purpose of marriage in mind.
So lets start by asking a very crucial question
Why did God give us marriage?
Unless that question is understood and agreed upon, both parties may be expecting different things out of marriage.
4 popular Christian Views on Marriage
The most popular Christian views on marriage is that it is a means for companionship. Genesis 2:18 says, "it is not good that man should be alone so I will make a helper suitable for him." But can't home sometimes be the loneliest place? Sometimes there are better friends outside of the marriage than inside.
Many Christians view marriage as a means for procreation. Genesis 1:22 says "be fruitful and multiply". In fact, I heard about a woman who divorced her husband because he wouldn't sleep with her unless it was for the purpose of having a baby. The Bible does list this as a blessing of marriage, but all of nature, especially rabbits, mice and rats procreate really well! If it's just for producing offspring we can do that without being married. If marriage was meant for procreation then God has a poor sense of humor.
Many Christians think the purpose of marriage is to gain pleasure and romance. Proverbs 5:19 says, "Let her breasts satisfy thee at all times and be thou ravished always with her love." But some men experience this without being married...we don't need to say more.
What about marriage being for the purpose of complementing the other?
Genesis 2:18 says, "I will make him a helper suitable for him." But
sadly many couples compete more than they compliment. It is sometimes
one spouse against the other.
God knows the end from the beginning. He knew that marriage is a tender institution. He knew that man would sin and become corrupt and selfish and pervert the relationship. He knew that people would become mean and cruel, seeking for a divorce over every trivial conflict. Why then wouldn't he give it to the angels who would do a better job with it? They for sure would guard it as a sacred trust.
And yet, the Bible says that marriage is only for this age (Luke 20:34-36). It is only given to us in the context of just this world. So why didn't he make marriage a little easier? Why didn't he make women a little more logical and practical in their thinking? Or why didn't he make men with a little more feeling and emotion? It seems like everything is against the idea of marriage.
It was designed to teach us valuable lessons on how to become one with God.
What is the greatest hindrance to becoming one with God?
What relationship calls for the most denial of self?
When you look at THE marriage passage in the Bible (Ephesians 5) you'll see an interesting progression. It starts out talking about marriage (Eph 5:22-33). Then children (Eph 6:1-4). Then work (Eph 6:5-9). Each of those relationships call for a denial of self.
God has designed marriage specifically for us on this earth because he KNEW we would sin. He gave marriage to this planet alone. The angels didn't need it! They were already one with God. But he knew we would not remain one with Him, but that sin would come in and mar the work of His hands.
Therefore, it would be a tool for the working out of our own salvation. It would be a fortress to shield us from the corruption and selfishness which sin had introduced.
It is a symbol, a precious lesson book of the union between Christ and His church.
it comes to Christian views on marriage, this is the most critical
paradigm to adopt. When both parties have this goal in mind, their
marriage can thrive and be a little taste of heaven on earth.
Read more for oneness in marriage